


Piece of Me

by MysticDeadman



Category: Persona 5, Persona 5: Dancing Star Night, Persona 5: Dancing in Starlight, Persona Series
Genre: Friendship, Gen, Hobbies, Self-Discovery, Unexpected Hobbies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-04
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2020-06-03 20:14:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 13,024
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19471357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MysticDeadman/pseuds/MysticDeadman
Summary: The Phantom Thieves made important discoveries about themselves during their time traversing the Metaverse. Some of those important things seem smaller than one would expect.





	1. Lock and Load

**Author's Note:**

> I got the idea to do this after my 4th run through the game ("romancing" Futaba, funnily enough) and I noticed how the PTs talk about different aspects of themselves now that they're PTs.

Take a deep breath. Focus on your target. Ignore the voices around you.

Well, unless they’re your targets calling themselves out. Definitely don’t ignore that. Don’t wanna get kicked out like you almost did last time.

Take a deep breath. Keep an eye on what’s going on in front of--

Wait.

Something moved in that room off to the left. I swear I saw it. There’s gotta be somebody over there. Okay, let’s take this easy. Shots are still whizzing by. Gotta wait for them to stop before I can do my thing.

Wait for it…

Wait for it…

Wait…

for…

it…

There’s the shouting again. Shots stopped. They’re reloading. GO NOW!

Race from cover to cover. Don’t stop until you get behind the next one. Keep going! Keep going! Ignore the shots flying by, none of them are hitting you anyway.

That’s the wall to the building! VELCRO YOUR SPINE!

Okay, you made it. Got through cleanly, didn’t get hit, and now you’re ready. Let’s do this.

Sneak in quietly. Don’t let whoever is in here know you’re here too. Light steps, stay on the balls of your feet. Keep it quiet. You learned how to do this last year with Joker.

Huh, Ren. Wonder how he’s doing right now?

NO STOP.

Think about him later. Right now, you’ve got a room to clear.

Round the next corner. Keep your eyes open. Make sure nobody’s hiding in a dark corner somewhere. Doing good so far, haven’t run into any hiders.

Hey, we found a room with windows! And there’s the guy we saw run in here! Nice! Oh crap, he’s got a partner with him. They’re not looking behind them, though, so we still have the edge. Just remember, you’re too close. You can’t open fire without making a lot of people mad.

Slip behind the wall the doorway’s on. Take a deep breath. You’ve handled way worse than this. Granted, you had seven other people helping you, but this is fine. It’s just, y’know, scaled down.

One more breath. Peek and make sure they’re not paying attention. They’re not. Perfect. One more breath. Calm your nerves. Count your ambush down.

3…

2…

1…

GO!

Rush in, raise your gun, take aim and…

“BANGBANG! BANGBANG!”

The two guys at the window jump a little before turning around. I can hear them groaning while they raise their hands. They’re not . I feel my lips curling in a smile under my face mask. Got these guys good!

Ow!

A sharp sting just flared on my shoulder! A couple more pings hit me on my armor, but it’s more than enough. I bring my hand up and wave it, shouting that I’m hit. The two guys look at each other, sharing a grin. It takes me a second, but I figure out what’s going on here..

“You guys set me up, didn’t you?”

One of the guys looks at me, still smiling.

“Well, we had to figure out a way to take you down. We figured we could waste a couple of respawns to bait you out.”

I’m giggling now. I haven’t been doing this for long, but I managed to gain myself a bit of a reputation for being kinda good at airsoft. I blame Ren for it.

An hour later, everyone from the game is leaving the field. The shop we used to visit last year is still open, and Iwai started hosting games to let people learn about how much fun this game is. He’s giving out water bottles to everyone that played, and boy do I need one of those. I head over to a spot inside that doesn’t have people chatting about the game and take off my armor. I pull up my sleeve real quick and take a look at the damage done from the ambush. I can’t help but cringe when I see it. A welt’s forming where I got it. Someone got a shot on me that missed my vest and did some real damage. I let out a sigh. Usually, if I get hit, my shooters can keep it on my mask or body armor. Someone probably pulled the trigger on first sight.

Can’t blame ‘em, though. When you’ve got a shot, you take it. I just wish it wouldn’t have done any damage.

My phone starts buzzing in my back pocket, and it surprises me. It’s easy to forget that it’s there when I’m in the middle of a game. I pull it out to see a text message waiting for me.

> _Director: Don’t forget about the shoot tomorrow. We’re doing it for a summer line, so be ready for it!_

Oof. The timing on this couldn’t have been any better. Or worse. I can’t tell which. I’m just glad that I’ve already seen the fashion line ahead of time and know that there’s a ton of shirts with sleeves. The BB hit me in that spot where the should meets the arm, so almost everything in the line will cover the welt. I shot a quick text back to the shoot Director.

> _Me: Don’t worry! I’ll be ready! 4 o’clock, right?_

I can wait for his answer on my way home. I grab my bag, which Iwai lets me keep behind the counter thanks to my connection to Ren, and stuff my gun into it. I sling it over my shoulder, say bye to the old man, and head out. I can’t wait for the shoot tomorrow.

Or the next time Untouchables hosts an airsoft game.


	2. Ball-dig

I’ve been having these weird thoughts lately…

Like...is any of this for real?

Or not?

…

…

…

Pfft. Sorry, I couldn’t say that with a straight face. Lordship Souls is an amazing franchise and that was the first thing I could think to say.

No, but seriously, I really have been having some weird urges lately. It’s been the strangest thing that’s ever happened to me.

Well, maybe not as strange as watching the man I could think of as my big brother shoot God between the eyes, but it’s up there.

No, this weirdness came from one weird night. A night where I felt like I didn’t get any rest at all, but didn’t dream about anything. I didn’t feel rested, but I did wake up more excited and energetic, somehow.

I know that’s Ren’s fault somehow. I just haven’t figured out how. Oh, but believe you me, I’m gonna get to the bottom of that night. I swear on my Fetherman collection that I will find the connection between Ren and that restful restless night!

And, of course, these weird urges I’ve been having thanks to him.

It’s been so weird, too. I don’t know how else to describe it. Ever since Ren came to this town, to Sojiro’s cafe, my life has been turned right-side up. I know the saying is “upside-down,” but it’d been that way ever since my Mom was taken away from me. It probably goes without saying, but Ren and the Phantom Thieves rescuing me from my own prison was the best thing that could’ve ever happened.

And, at the same time, it’s the weirdest thing. Mostly because now, I’ve gotten all these strange urges. It’s been a couple of weeks ever since that one night, but I can’t help but feel like that night was the whole reason I picked up this new interest.

At first, I had to be extremely careful about getting into it. Spending time with Ren and the others might have helped me work on my social anxiety, but I’m not completely over it. Truth is, I don’t know if I’ll ever be. It takes years and years of work to help someone work through years and years of psychological trauma.

Which is why, when I first started following through on these urges, I had to be extra careful. I basically redid a wall in my room with soundproofing material to make sure any sound I was making wouldn’t make it out to the hallway.

Next, came deep carpeting. Thanks to our exploits raiding dungeons and Mementos as the PTs (and yes, I’m calling us that, shut up about it), it wasn’t too hard to gather up enough money to get what I needed. The real problem was trying to buy enough carpeting to cover my floor without making a whole lot of noise. Since I didn’t want anyone to know what I was up to, that made this mission nearly impossible. I ended up having to settle on the next best thing. A bigger rug that the one I had, but thicker too. Chances were that the thrashing around I was going to be doing was going to make a lot of noise, and I live on the second floor of Sojiro’s house. Not a great combination if I want to keep this a secret and not keep him up all night at the same time.

Thirdly was the equipment. As it turns out, these new urges of mine require some...”special” equipment to do right. Problem is, though, is that this equipment would be super loud no matter how many precautions I took. I was probably going to be making enough noise anyway, so I figured I can prolly wait on that stuff until I can figure something else out.

Eh, it’s fine. It’s not like I’m not used to being barefoot anyway. It’s just gonna take a little getting used to.

I look up some videos online. I know it’s probably best to learn stuff like this in person, but sometimes circumstances don’t allow for it. I may be dummy rich, but that doesn’t mean I, as a first-year high school student, can just go out and buy a car to go take lessons on this stuff.

Honestly, I don’t even know if they’d let me sign up for lessons on my own.

So, I’d learn on my own. I found a video on OurTube that explained the basics really well, and the demonstrations were clear as day, so on the first night I could do so, I started my training in earnest.

I’d stand in the middle of my room in the dead of night. The only light I’d have in the room was the light from my monitors. Most of them just had different game or anime websites up, but the main one in the middle had the video I needed on it. I made sure my headphones were plugged in to cut down on the noise. Once I’m ready, I reach over to my mouse and start the video.

Okay, here we go. Lift one heel. Shift my weight to my other foot. Hold my heel up for a second, then bring it down. Switch sides and do it again. Keep going until it feels comfortable. I make sure the restart the segment talking about this over and over, making sure I’m getting the form down right.

It takes a few minutes, but I feel like I’m getting the hang of it. Following a rhythm in real life is a lot harder than it is when I’m playing Boogie Boogie Breakdown, but I figure that all I need is practice. Once I get the “heel-drop” down, I let the video keep going into the next part. The “Ball-dig” is tough. It’s harder on my feet than the first step, so I have to stop every now and then get some rest. A couple more reps, and I think I can call it a night and pick up again tomorrow.

I keep at that schedule for the next couple of days. It’s a lot more work than I thought it would be, and I was already expecting to be tired. Night three was the one, though. The one where all of my hard work in hiding my interests went straight to hell.

I started combining the heel-drop and ball-dig to really learn the basic steps. On one particular lift, though, things went horribly wrong. I brought my heel up, only for my sole to start tightening painfully.

I’m having a foot cramp, and it hurts like hell. I thought I was going to be loud when I teaching myself to do this. That was nothing compared to my foot trying to collapse in on itself. I rub away at it furiously, trying to get the muscles to relax. By the time I get it to stop, though, it’s too late.

“Futaba!”

My door flies open, and through my tear-covered eyes, I see Sojiro standing in my doorway. He looks so scared. He must’ve thought something bad happened to me. He’s looking at me with the most terrified expression I’ve ever seen in real life. He see me holding my foot, and it looks like he’s relaxing a bit.

“Uh...”

In that second, I’d forgotten all about my cramp. In that second, all I could feel is my face getting ready to go supernova. In that second, I did the only logical thing in that situation. I throw off my headphones and dive into my blankets. I’m not sure I was really even saying anything, but I’m so embarrassed about the whole thing that I know I hear some squealing coming out of me. I’m buried so deep into my bed that I can’t tell what Sojiro’s doing. I can only shake inside my blankets.

Seconds.

Minutes.

Hours.

Days.

Forever. It feels like forever before anything else happens. I hear my door close quietly, but I can’t even bring myself to care about it. I’m too busy being crushed by theembarrassment of the whole situation.

I don’t know when I did, but I find myself snapping awake the next morning, still curled up in my bed.

Two days pass, and I can barely look Sojiro in the eye. Every time he and I are in the same room, I just get so embarrassed that I can’t even last two seconds. I feel like he’s a final boss and I’m the unlucky level one noob that got dragged into the raid.

Can I at least get some time to, I dunno, mine for some decent drops or something?

At least he’s been going out to work like normal. I need time to wallow in misery again.

It’s been three days since Sojiro walked in on my self-teaching lessons. Right now, we’re sitting in his car somewhere in downtown Shibuya. Today was going along like any other day in the life of Oracle. Until after breakfast, that is. Sojiro told me not to eat too much because he had plans for me today. I was kinda worried, since I wasn’t sure what exactly that meant. The Alibaba in me wanted to dig around in his phone to uncover whatever secret he was hiding from me.

But then, I remembered that this is Sojiro I’m thinking about. He’d done nothing but take care of me as well as he could ever since Mom died.

Once I’m done eating, we pile into his car and make our way into town.

By the way, whoever invented traffic is the worst person in the history of forever and should be tied to the back of a car and dragged through his abomination of a contribution to society.

We’re parked right outside of a certain building right now. I’d stared out the window on the way here, but I never really noticed anything out of the ordinary. But now...now that I see where we are, the embarrassment’s come back.

But this time, it’s not as bad as it was a couple of nights ago. That time, I wanted to die. This time, though, I’m scared. Another familiar feeling hits me. I’m going to be surrounded by all kinds of strangers. That hasn’t been too big of a problem lately, though, because I’ve been okay to go into the city whenever I needed stuff. Once I discovered that people don’t really pay attention to other people around them if they don’t need to, handling big crowds got easier and easier. Here, though, the crowd’s smaller. It’s going to be the same number of people as there are in my classes at Shujin.

And they’re going to be watching me. That part’s the one that gets at me the most. I’m shaking in my seat. I don’t know if I can handle forty-something eyes all staring at me.

But, at the same time, something else is in there. It’s a feeling that took me a while to get used to. A feeling that, a year ago, I never thought I’d ever have in my life ever again. A feeling that, without Ren and the others coming to my rescue, would’ve been buried deep in me for however long the rest of my life would’ve been.

I’m happy.

Dad tells me that, the night he’d broken into my room worried, he’d hesitated for a few seconds after I did a Deep Dive into my bed. He saw what was on my computer screen, all the changes that I’d made to my room, and closed the cafe early the last few days looking up this place. That’s how we wound up here.

We’ve been sitting here, outside the dance studio, for a couple of minutes. He signed me up for actual classes. Three days a week, and they’re so late after school that I don’t have to worry about them messing with my homework or not spending time with Kana.

But all I can focus on right now is how scared I am. I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t know if I can _handle_ this. I just want to tell Dad to turn the car back on and--

“I could sit in on the class with you, if that’s what you want.”

I look up at him. God, I hate it when he gives me that warm smile. It makes it really hard for me to say no to him.

So, I don’t.

“Would you, please? I don’t want to be alone for this.”

Dad does something I never thought he would. He brings his hand up and pats me a couple of times on my head. I can’t help but squeak when he does. Mom used to do it when she was happy or proud of me. I had Ren do it one time, but it felt super weird. I never asked him to do it again, but I think it was because I don’t really see him as more than a brother to me. But, when Sojiro does it, it’s almost like when Mom would do it. I feel all warm and happy inside. Knowing that he cares about me and wants me to be happy does a lot to make me feel better.

I don’t want to get over every trauma that I’ve been through. I know it sounds weird, since most people that have the kinds of thoughts that I have would love to get through everything. Now that I think about it, maybe it’s not that I don’t want to get over it. Maybe it’s more like I don’t want to _forget_. I don’t want to forget about the pain. I don’t want to forget the misery.

Because if it weren’t for that, I know that I wouldn’t want to forget all of the happy feelings I getting these days. And I hope Ren visits soon, that was I can talk to him about it. And show off my new sick tap dance routine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I started writing this chapter, I thought it was going to be about the same length as Ann's chapter was. I was ready to just hammer out another quick short and get ready for the next one.
> 
> Then I realized just how much I actually connect with Futaba and, before I knew it, I had 2k words set.
> 
> Tap dancing Futaba from the Live-P Sound Bomb concert was adorable. Tap dancing Futaba in Dancing In Starlight is too good for life.


	3. Going Home

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I started this project thinking these were going to be short oneshots. I wasn't expecting to peer into the very depths of my own soul with each chapter.

Y’know, there’s something satisfying about hearing a nice, loud crack that really speaks to me.

Ever since I’d met up with Ren on that one rainy morning, things in my life had taken one hell of a turn. Thanks to Kamoshida’s screwing around, my life as I’d known it was basically ruined in one day. It was hard. I’m not sayin’ that I’m completely innocent about things. After all, I kinda _was_ the one who decided to get in his face about the abuse he was putting us through when I prolly coulda been a little more calm about it. Still, looking back on it, I don’t think I would’ve done anything differently. Hell, I’d probably still let my knee get shattered if it meant bein’ able to find friends that actually understand me.

Also, bein’ a badass Phantom Thief and righting some of the wrongs in the worl d was pretty cool too. Havin’ Captain Kidd, and later on Seiten Taisen, was freakin’ awesome, ain’t gonna lie. It was weird at first. From the first time I tore my mask off my face, I could always feel them in the back of my mind.  At first, it just felt like he was watching me, waiting to see what I was gonna do about what was goin’ on around me. I had a hard time gettin’ used to it for a while. I mean, sure, the Cap’n was awesome to have in battle, but once we were out of the Metaverse, it was like he’d follow me around everywhere, sittin’ on his ass like my life was a movie to him.

Once I’d gotten used to the idea of havin’ him around, he helped me more than I ever thought he would. One night, after I finished helping my mom around the house, I’d decided to make like the bad drivers you’d see on TV and just crash.  He didn’t do anything unusual throughout the day, so I hadn’t given him a whole lot of though t.

But once I’d fallen asleep, the Cap’n asked me a question I never thought I’d hear.

“ _All this time that you and your friends have been stealing the desires of the wicked, have you not considered what it is that_ you _desire from all this?”_

This is probably the point where I say that he blew my mind.

Instead, I looked at him for a minute before I called him an idiot. He wasn’t happy about that. We prolly argued with each other all night. That was prolly the first night in a while that I felt like I’d actually gotten any rest.

But the one thing that got to me the most about bein’ a Phantom Thief? The one bit I found appealed to me the most out of anything?

Swinging my bat and cracking it on whatever decided it didn’t want to get out of the way.

Fighting Shadows was the best way most of us could work out our frustrations.  Being able to talk about shit with the others is pretty nice, but sometimes you just gotta let everything out. If ya don’t, you might end up getting as pressed as Makoto was before becoming a Phantom Thief.  It’s kinda sad, when I think about it. We didn’t really talk much before the shit with Kaneshiro went down, but it’s a huge difference between what Makoto was like before then and the way Queen is now.

So whenever I had a chance to take a huge swing and let loose, you bet yer ass I’d put everything I had into it. And every time I did, I could feel myself getting stronger and stronger. Muscles I knew about, and some I didn’t,  burned every time I smacked the shit out of a Shadow Ren didn’t want to catch. Futaba would always talk about it like it was a video game or somethin’; like, how every fight gave us XP and after a while we’d level up, or some shit. I dunno. I mean, it made perfect sense to me since I play games too, but it wasn’t like we were just raiding dungeons or whatever. We were puttin’ our lives on the line every time we tapped on that red eye on our phones. It wasn’t a game. It wasn’t pixels on a TV screen. It was real. Every shot we too was real. Every time we called our Personas, it was real.

But, most importantly to me, every swing I took was real.

And.

It.

Felt.

DAMN GOOD!

I got hooked in a hurry. Pipe-to-dome was like a drug for me, and every Metaverse dive was like going to my supplier. I got my fix every chance I got. I was addicted to it. Good part about that was that, thanks to Mona, Makoto and sometimes Futaba (when she got off her ass, don’t tell Ren I said that or he’ll kick mine), even if I got badly hurt in a fight, I’d still come out of it better than I ever was.

Thank God Makoto isn’t hearing any of this. She’d talk my ear off about comparing fighting to a drug. Never mind that even now, she’s still some kind of martial arts badass biker that I’m convinced came back in time from the future and is gonna deny it until she dies.

Bad part about it, though, was that when we tore the Metaverse and Real World apart, I’d also lost that chance to get that feeling again. 

I started taking my running more seriously after Ren left for home. I’d go out for runs more days out of the week, or I’d go on longer runs that covered more of the city. Every time I finished, I felt tired, but still pretty fired up from the exercise. The running was good for my knee, too, since it gave it some extra work. Problem with running, though, is that I never got that same adrenaline rush at the end. Sure, I felt good about myself, but that was it. Swinging on Shadows made me feel more  _alive_ .  _That’s_ what I missed the most.

I’d gone a couple of months missing the feeling of bat-on-head action before I really took the time out to think about it.  And when I really thought about it,  the solution was so obvious. It was so stupidly obvious that I was surprised I hadn’t thought of it sooner.

I was surprised that I wasn’t hittin’ balls sooner.

…

….

…..

_Baseballs_ , ya effin’ pervs.

There were times during our PT days (Dammit Futaba, now she’s got  _me_ sayin’ it!), that we’d all go up to the batting cages by  Leblanc to spend some time hangin’ out or working on hand-eye coordination. It was fun, and I’d always catch little bits of that rush when I’d smack the ball. I’d really think about it, and the thing I think ruined my buzz about it was that the balls would always either smack  the target, which felt really good anyway, or the back of the cage. I’d love it if I could see those balls sail off into the distance, never to return again! That’d be the best thing in the world, and it’d let me mix together  getting to hit something really hard and getting a really good result with a nice hard run.

I talked to my mom about it one day. She was surprised (amazin’ how much that emotion popped up in my life nowadays) when I brought it up to her, but was totally willing to help me find  a league somewhere close to home that I could sign up for.

Which is why I’m starin’ down the guy who’s trying to punch my ticket back to the bench.

Lemme set the stage real quick. It’s the bottom of the seventh (this league only plays seven innings). We’re batting, and I’m at the plate. We’re down by a run. There’s a guy on First Base, and a guy on Third. One guy’s already struck out, so I’m in a huge spot. One swing could tie the game for us and push us into extra innings. One huge swing could end it by either getting my guy at First a chance to get to Home. One bad swing, and the game’s over.

Oh, and this just happens to be for the league championship. So, ya know. No pressure or nothin’.

The pitcher’s staring me down hard. He knows the guy at First isn’t gonna try and steal. It’s too risky. Gettin’ picked off screws our chances of even tying it up. The pitcher shakes his head a couple of times, trying to  figure out which pitch he wants to try on me. He nods once. He’s ready.

And so am I.

He winds up. Since there’s people on base, he can’t take his time or be too flashy about it, but he does as much as he can.

Pause.

Hold.

Wait for it…

And he launches one. I can’t afford to be trigger happy, so I let this one go. It’s a hot fastball, so it goes by at waist level for a quick strike one.

This guy ain’t playin’ around. A ground ball ends the game, and he wants it, bad.

Next pitch, it’s a curveball. It breaks a little too soon, so it’s an easy call for me to lay off. 1-1.

I’m ready for a slow one here,  so when he throws another heater, I end up swinging way late and just barely foul it off. Also barely keep my balance, but that’s less important. 1-2.

I take a couple of seconds outside the Batter’s Box to think. I fix my gloves, replaying the at-bat in my head. He’s got some good stuff. Gonna have to work for this, I think. The Ump’s already calling for me to get into the box, so I gotta set myself here.

Next pitch comes in, and it’s another curve. I let this one go to, and it’s good that I do cuz this one practically bounces up to the plate. 2-2.

Take a deep breath. This has gotta be the one.  The time when I do what I always did as a PT and make things happen. Do the damage. Be the guy.

Except I wasn’t about that as a PT, but it’s fine.

Two more pitches go by. The first one misses away, and I have to fight off the one after. It’s a full count after 6 pitches, and I don’t have a whole lot of time to make somethin’ happen. Hell, I’ll take a walk if it means we can keep going.  I settle myself down, and get ready for the next one.

It’s a fast ball. I’m ready for it. Dig the toe. Turn the hips. Give a swing and...

There it is. The feeling of  metal on leather.  The CLANG! of bat on ball. I think I hear my team shouting about the hit, but all I can focus on is  _GET YOUR ASS TO FIRST OR SO HELP ME--_

Then, it happens. The ball sails. It’s flying high. It’s flying far. For a split second, it seems like I might have won the game for us in one swing. But then the ball starts to drop way too soon. I’m almost to first, but the guy that was there is about two or three steps off the base. If it falls in the outfield like it looks like it wants to, I might have tied the game. Worst case, right fielder catches it, and the guy on third has a shot to score.

Instead, something else happens. Something none of us expects. The right fielder can’t get to the ball fast enough, and it bounces off the Right Field wall and way from the fielder.

I’m pretty sure that the same two words flashed through all of our heads at the exact same time.

_HAUL_

_ASS_

All three of us take off as fast as we could. It takes a second or two for the right fielder to get to the ball, and it’s all the time we need. The guy on Third scores easily, and that’s all we really needed for me to do. It’s the fact that the other guy is taking a hell of a risk by not stopping at Third and just going for it. It’s a long run, and there’s not as much time as he thinks there is before the right fielder is able to pick up the ball and take a shot at Home.

I stop at Second and watch. A throw to home could be a good chance to go one more base, but my mind makes me stop and think that it’s better to be on instead of taking a chance at getting thrown out on a good throw from right.

Turns out I didn’t need to worry about it. The throw bounces a couple of times and ends up going wide right. It’s off just enough to carry the catcher out of the way and give our runner an open lane Home.

He takes it. A head first slide. The catcher gets the ball just in time to try and make a dive of his own. It’s close. Super close. Like, I don’t know how the ump didn’t just flip a coin close. But he makes his call.

And the next thing I know, I’m running straight home too, where everyone else on my team is losing their minds. We’re all just jumping around and screaming. A couple of the guys run back to our dugout and grab the Sportade cooler for a shower, and the only reason I knew that it happened was because they dumped it on me.

This was it. This was exactly the feeling I missed from the Metaverse. The feeling of an impact. The adrenaline of being in action. The excitement of winning. This was exactly what I needed, and I’m glad I found a way to get an out.

Ren’s due back in town for a visit here pretty soon. Can’t wait to show him the Championship team pic I’ve got. Hopefully I’ll have the trophy to show off too. Can’t wait to hear about what he’s been up to, too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like what you’ve seen and want to keep up with the Internet’s Eternal Phenomenon, then be sure to follow me on social media! I’m on Twitter (@MysticDeadman), Instagram (@mystic_deadman), DeviantArt (MysticDeadman), Fanfiction (Mystic Deadman) and YouTube (Mystic Deadman)!
> 
> I also stream! My stream schedule is on my Twitter, and my channel can be found at twitch(dot)tv(slash)mysticdeadman


	4. High Octane

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> These chapters keep getting longer and longer. Dammit Deadman, stop connecting with the characters.

It's a thrill like no other I've ever experienced.

Ever since I joined the Phantom Thieves, I've found more and more opportunities to open up to others. For so long, I had the idea in my head that simply being compliant and keeping things to myself, I would make the people around me happy. However, doing so never helped the one person that I needed to help the most.

Myself.

So many times, the adults around me would take advantage of my nature. They would ask me to donor say things that I didn't necessarily like or agree with and, like a fool, I would keep those feelings to myself. I wouldn't let anyone know about my pain or frustration. Nobody cared about what they said about me or had me do. I was the silent yes-girl. There was no chance that I would argue.

I think Sis saw what was happening to me before I ever did. There was a point in my life that the stresses of everything around me was getting to be too much. It was so hard for me to keep up appearances and continue to smile and nod, so she did something about it.

Even before everything had happened, I had my sights set on being in law enforcement. She used that as an excuse to get me enrolled in Aikido classes. At first, I didn't think much of it. Early on, you don't learn any difficult throws or holds. Instead, you're drilled on learning to take falls and simple, one motion throws. But as time went on, I started to feel some of the agony start to lift. The martial arts became a way for me to relieve the stress I would allow the world to throw onto my shoulders. Aikido became my stress relief, and I would often imagine that my opponent was actually someone in my life that I felt needed to deliver their spine to the ground. Every throw was another wave of pain released. Years would go by. I'd hone my craft, and eventually, I would start dominating local tournaments. Aikido was the best thing that'd ever happen to me.

Then, in my third year at Shujin Academy, a scruffy-haired criminal transferred in.

Just like with my lessons, I didn’t have much of an opinion on Amamiya when I first saw him. He just seemed to be like any other person, really. I had heard the rumors surrounding him about the reason why he was with us, but looking at him never gave me the impression that any of it was true. I found it difficult to believe that anyone so...plain-looking…was capable of assaulting anyone. From what I understood before I got involved with him, he was fairly well-educated. He could answer a few of his teachers’ surprise questions, though he did fall victim to Mr. Ushimaru’s infamous “Chalk Rocket Attack,” as many of the male students call it, in his first week.

In fact, if Morgana and Ann are to be believed, he got nailed twice. I can’t help but laugh at the image of Joker rubbing away at his forehead, trying to get rid of the evidence.

Principal Kobayakawa warned me about him beforehand, wanting me to keep an eye on him while keeping up with my regular duties. That just ended up adding to the pressure he, among others in the school, stacked on me. If that weren’t enough, the so-called “delinquent” had managed to get into an altercation with Coach Kamoshida less than  _a single day_ of his transfer. I knew that something like  that would end up reflecting badly on me, and I think I took that stress out on my poor throwing partner that night.

Matters only escalated for me when another second year student, Shiho Suzui, attempted to take her own life on school grounds. To that point, I had been able to keep my eyes on Amamiya from a distance, but nothing out of the ordinary sprung up. In fact, if anything, the fact that he had quickly become friends with Ryuji Sakamoto  _and_ Ann Takamaki, two others who themselves had problems with their peers, was the strangest thing about him. Then, the suicide attempt came, and the three of them had suddenly become closer than ever.  If I were a betting girl, I would have put money down on the three of them having something to do with Kamoshida’s public confession a few days later. That feeling strengthened when, out of nowhere, a boy from Kosei High would start hanging out with them not long after. It turned out that the boy, Yusuke Kitagawa, had been abused and plagiarized by his own mentor, Ichiryusai Madarame. Again, the timing of him joining the group seemed a little to convenient compared to Madarame coming out on public television about his abuse of not only Yusuke, but also many of his former students.

Then, for some reason, Principal Kobayakawa decided that the Phantom Thieves needed to be investigated within Shujin. Even now that I know that he was part of the conspiracy that ended up with a group of teenagers  _fighting with a literal god_ , I’ll still never understand the thought process behind having a high school student, Student Council President  or not, conduct what was essentially a police investigation on a potentially violent group of criminals that had managed to get two vicious criminals to confess their crimes.

What the  _hell_ was  _I_ supposed to do?

My investigation took a few days, but I felt like I was getting closer and closer to an answer. I tailed Amamiya as well as I could, though he somehow managed to find me out before too long. I blame his glasses for that. He must have found me in a reflection when he went to clean them off once. He likes to say I wasn’t exactly inconspicuous, but if I really was that easy to find, why did it take him so long to find me?

Ahem.

Either way,  tailing Amamiya provided me with some  information about the group, though it was never anything concrete. At best, even the most solid of circumstantial evidence I had barely connected any of the four to either of the incidents. Whenever he spent time with Takamaki or Kitagawa, they never did anything to indicate that they had any involvement. I had to wait until he talked to Sakamoto in order to get anything I could use.  Once I did, though, I decided I could use that to confront Amamiya about the cases.

T hanks to Ryuji’s big mouth  during my investigation , I’d found out all that I needed to know about the four  and what they had to do with the public confessions. And with that, I managed to strong-arm the Phantom Thieves into targeting a Yakuza ring that, again, I had been tasked with handling. Kobayakawa seemed to have it in his head that  being the Student Council President meant that I had the same authority as the police, so he tasked me with figuring out a way to deal with the Yakuza threat being posed to the students of Shujin.

With the Phantom Thieves in my back pocket, it was essentially a case of two birds, one stone.  All I had to do was have them eliminate the threat being posed on the school, and then I would have had one less thing to worry about. And then I made the absolutely  _idiotic_ mistake of trying to go after the  Yakuza leader just to try and expedite things.

That’s how I met Junya Kaneshiro and found out just how scummy and slimy people in the real world can be. Sure, I’d paid attention to Sis’ cases as much as I could, but it never really hit home just how horrible human beings can be to one another. I’d allowed not only myself, but three of my classmates and a student from another school in a position that we could’ve been extorted had things not worked out the way they did.

Instead, Ren brought me to the Metaverse and changed my life forever.

It wasn’t long after the Phantom Thieves brought me with them that I found out just how low a person could be willing to go in order to get what they want out of others. Not only had that scumbag Kaneshiro threatened me and the others with blackmail, but he’d also made a huge error on his part.

He threatened to bring my sister into this. The only living family I had left, and he’d promised to drag her into the mess I’d created. And then he told me to be complicit. That the only way to save us was to do as he said and keep quiet.

That was the last straw for me. It was bad enough that the adults around me could order me around and I would just comply. That making them happy would somehow make me happy. But then, a complete stranger and a total  _asshole_ did the same, and that was it. That was when I’d finally had enough and snapped. And when I did,  I  _snapped._

When I got home that night, and the adrenaline of the moment had worn off, I ended up spending a good portion of the night regretting that stomp. If I hadn’t known better, I would’ve sworn I had shattered every bone in my foot doing that.

But, that night in Kaneshiro’s bank awakened something in me. Something that I wouldn't realize until many months later. I’d gained a love of something in that first mission with the Phantom Thieves.  It took several weeks, dives into the Metaverse, and trips into Mementos itself, but I found something in that time that I never would have thought I would develop a passion for.

Which is why I find myself at a gym. At this point, I’ve already finished my workout for the day. Sis has been bringing me to the gym where she started taking kickboxing lessons lately. She signed me up for them a few days after we’d closed off our connection to the Metaverse and I have to say, it’s been surprisingly cathartic. Even though I’ve graduated from Shujin, my life hasn’t been any less stressful than it was before, though that’s mostly due to the workload I have in my college courses. There’s only so much stress one can work out of their system by throwing someone around a dojo for an hour or two every few days. Being a Phantom Thief helped me let things go, both mentally and physically.

“Come on, Sis,” I say, holding the heavy bag she’s currently trying to stare a hole through, “another couple of sets and we can call it for the night.”

She doesn’t answer me, but here, she doesn’t have to. I know she heard me, as she started putting a little more power into her punches and kicks for the last two sets I promised her. She finishes strong, just like I knew she would, and we gather the bags with our workout equipment that we had set off to the side. We take a few minutes to take quick showers. We’d decided a while ago that we didn’t want to take very long getting cleaned off at the gym. Public showers never really appealed to me, and Sis felt the same way. We’d much rather take baths at home to properly relax after a workout. It’s a fast affair; one that we’re glad is over once it’s over. Once we’re outside, though, I see what it is that _really_ allows me to let things go around me.

My 2016 Suzuki Bandit 1250S ABS.

There were many things about awakening a Persona that surprised me. The strength we gained. The almost magical abilities our Personas had. How much more durable and capable we’d all become. But the one thing that I enjoyed the most was the last thing I expected it to be.

My Personas, first Johanna and then Anat, were styled after motorcycles.

Whenever the Thieves would go into Mementos, I would often ride alongside Morgana on my Persona. Feeling the breeze as we sped along the train tracks was more relaxing to me than anything else I’d tried. The roar of the engines let me put my troubles in the back of my mind, where Johanna or Anat would take them and help me work through them. It never ceased to amaze me just how knowledgeable they were when it came to

Sadly, when we sealed off the Metaverse, I also sealed off my connection with Anat. I’d lost a piece of me. Thankfully, though, Ren had a way of making sure we were financially secure whenever we made our way through a Palace.

The look on Iwai’s face whenever we brought in bags of items that needed offloading never got old. I’m pretty sure that us bringing in thousands of yen worth of goods got old to him, though.

After everything had settled, Ren somehow found a way to make sure the money we’d gained in our exploits was completely legal for us to use. I’m not exactly sure how, and Sis made sure she had nothing to do with how our money was cleaned, just as a way to give herself some plausible deniability in case an investigation were to happen. Ren assured us it wouldn’t, and that the money he left us all with before going back home was ours to freely use.

That money was what helped me purchase the motorcycle I’m currently mounting. Sis is climbing aboard her own, also bought with Phantom Thief money. Part of me feels guilty about using that money to make such large purchases, but that gets quickly wiped out whenever I turn my key.

Revving the engine alone is such a cathartic feeling, and I can’t help but do so a couple of times whenever I go out for a ride. The rush of the ride is still as powerful as having Johanna or Anat with me, even if it’s slightly marred by the fact that I don’t have someone I can talk to at high speeds.

Having to wear a helmet is also a big difference between now and then. In the Metaverse and Mementos, I didn’t have a need for one, so I could feel the rush of air whip itself through my hair. It was like a much needed massage, and it only got more intense whenever Morgana and I would race each other through the twisted subway tunnels.

Not that Morgana ever challenged me to races. It was usually Ren who did, with our faithful guide either screaming in terror or grumbling about us the entire way. The races we would go through were low risk, anyway, since we would either clear out the floor beforehand, or we’d go through one of the higher floors and not even worry about the Shadows there.

But I’m gladly trading out the wind in my hair for being able to see the colors of the city flying by at speed. I could never take in a sight like this in the Metaverse. There were only two options when it came to the Metaverse: the nearly monotone colors of Mementos, or the brightly lit Palaces. The Palaces were too small to reasonably ride around, so I’d resigned myself to just blocking out the area around.

The real world is significantly different, though. I can’t go as fast as I could in Mementos, but the blurs of lights from street lamps, buildings and the occasional neon sign is just as intoxicating to me as going without a helmet.

“You going straight home?” Sis asks me as we pull up to a red light. We have earphones in our helmets so that we can make phone calls to each other while we’re driving. I shake my head.

“No, I’m going to ride around for a little bit. Most of my homework is done, anyway, so I have a little extra time before I need to go back and finish.”

Sis nods at me, and as the light turns green, we both take off. We’ll match pace for a little while, until she has to make a turn to take her home. I’ll just keep going once she does. I have some extra fuel money, so it’s not as though I’ll risk getting stranded or anything. I want to make a quick stop in Yongen-Jaya, just to see how Boss and the cafe are doing. I should probably check in on Futaba, too. I hear she’s been working on something for Ren. That makes me think for a minute.

I think I’ll take Ren for a ride when he comes back to town. He promised me a date when he left, but I think I can contribute to our night out a bit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you like what you’ve seen and want to keep up with the Internet’s Eternal Phenomenon, then be sure to follow me on social media! I’m on Twitter (@MysticDeadman), Instagram (@mystic_deadman), DeviantArt (MysticDeadman), Fanfiction (Mystic Deadman) and YouTube (Mystic Deadman)!
> 
> I also stream! My stream schedule is on my Twitter, and my channel can be found at twitch.tv/mysticdeadman


	5. True Canvas

It amazes me how much can change within a short period of time. I cannot help but think, as I sit here in my room, surrounded by paintings I had created, how much differently my life could have played out if I had my eyes not been opened against my will.

Under the teachings of Ichriryusai Madarame, I learned to use the canvas as a method of expressing myself. I would show the world what it was that I felt in my heart, and the world would have the opportunity to see what I had to offer to it.

This lasted a short while, though. As it would turn out, the assignments that Madarame would give me in order to build upon my talents would end up sold off, funding a rather lavish lifestyle compared to the living I had under him.

And I, the fool I was at the time, allowed it to happen. I had known for a while that Madarame was robbing his students of their futures. That he would take their works, pawn them off as his own, and then discard his so-called “students” when they held no monetary value to him. Many of those thrown to their own devices fell into a deep depression, and one took his own life.

I fell victim to Madarame’s scheme. Unlike his former students, however, I was more complicit in his actions. I allowed myself to be taken advantage of, out of a somewhat twisted sense of obligation. It was he who took me in as a child after my mother passed, and I felt as though I owed him for saving my life. So I would create work for him, fooling myself into thinking I was learning anything of value from him. I would allow him to take my work for himself, selling it to fund the life he chose to lead and leaving me with the bare essentials to live off of. I felt that not exposing him for the fraud that he was, was the least I could do to pay him back for allowing to me to live and that there was nothing that would cause me to think otherwise.

But then, one day, the greatest muse I had ever come across entered my life.

At first, she wasn’t willing to model for me. I had quickly become desperate for her, though, as the greatest waves of inspiration washed over me whenever I was in her presence. She consistently refused, unwilling to fulfill my simple request to her. But, for every invitation she rebuffed, I could only feel the need to reach out to her grow. After one final rejection, I could feel my inspiration leaving me. My muse was departing, and I knew that there would be no way for me to stop it. One day, however, she approached me. She had reconsidered her position on the matter, and was willing to model for me.

It was not only her, however, but her friends that would save me from the future I had created from myself. Ann, Ryuji, Morgana and Ren would all be the ones to liberate me from the shackles I’d locked myself in, and by extension, allow me to help fight against the some of the wrongdoings plaguing the city.

After joining the Phantom Thieves, and finding justice for all of the former students of Madarame, I found that I had gained something in my life that I previously held in low regard. It was an aspect of fundamental living that I was sure I could do without, only to learn that I had been missing out on so much that I never would have had, had I allowed myself to continue work under Madarame.

Friends.

First was Ann. She was the one that would bring light into my otherwise dark life, and the person who led me down the road to freedom. Though she would never actually pose for me in the way I requested, the way she conducted herself both in and out of the Metaverse were inspiration enough for me. In the real world, she acted as an anchor for us. She spoke her mind, much in the way most of us would, but would also act as a calming force for us whenever emotions would run too high. She had a way of easing tensions when Ryuji would become too excited, and would find a positive to grab on to whenever we were in a low mood.

Ryuji was the most spirited of us. His energy could be infectious, which made it difficult to be upset whenever excitement came over him. He held enough confidence in not only himself, but all of us, that we would often feel as if we could do anything. He also served as a source of amusement for us. He was, scholastically speaking, the most challenged of the group, and it was difficult not to dig away at that wound whenever he slipped.

Ren, our defacto leader, is a man of few words. One could often find him off to the side, taking in the conversations in a room. He would observe as much as he could, taking stock of the situations before him and acting on what he felt would be the best action to take. Of course, there would be times where such action would have unforeseen consequences, but that risk came with making such decisions. He was the one who brought us all together in the first place, and if not for him, we would all be in situations much, much more dire than the lives we now lead.

Makoto, the Shujin Academy Student Council President, would be one of us that one would think would never have been a part of the Phantom Thieves. From what I could gather about her whenever we spent time together, she seemed to be easily the most levelheaded person I had ever met. Her calm demeanor, ability to plan ahead and create effective strategies was something to be admired by anyone who could get to know her. On the other hand, her rather extensive knowledge in martial arts and somewhat explosive temper also made her a force to fear, and only the foolish would ever attempt to antagonize her.

Junya Kaneshiro learned that lesson the hard way.

Haru was an interesting subject, to say the least. She, like Makoto, was a third-year student at Shujin. She is the heir of a multi-million yen business and, despite what many people would like to think of her, did not let that go to her head for even a moment. In fact, her first act as a Phantom Thief was to assist us in changing her late father’s heart after we learned exactly how he was making his profits. It could be argued that part of her motivation was second-hand guilt for how he would treat his employees, while another part could easily have been the chance to finally act out in a way that her father would not approve. Much like how Makoto would repress her emotions to the point where her dam was one push away from bursting, Haru would fight as though she were a woman possessed, enjoying the rush of battle so much that even Ren would often gingerly dance away from her after particularly difficult battles. That passion, however, would bleed into aspects of her life away from Thievery. She developed quite the green thumb, growing plants on the rooftop of Shujin that we would use for our benefit. She parlayed that into a branch of her family business that anyone could tell she deeply enjoyed.

And Futaba. I’m not sure what it is, but there is something about the youngest member of our group that I cannot help but admire. Though none of us have had easy lives, Futaba came from darkness deeper than any of the rest of us. She was ready to bring an end to things by her own hand. She saw, however, a way out of the imprisonment she’d created for herself through us. Though she was naive about our exact methods at the time, her self-rescue mission seemed to awaken and enlighten her in ways none of us had anticipated. Gone in a near instant was the fearful child that sought release from her self-inflicted suffering. Instead, we gained an information expert whose skill with a keyboard was nearly as frightful as her ability to assist us in combat despite not taking a direct part in battle herself. She had also gone from a rather snarky, petulant child that had a rather difficult time interacting with the world around her to a rather snarky, petulant child that seemed to think she was a better comedian than she thought she truly was.

Although, there was that one time in Mementos where we were scouring the upper levels for materials for stronger weapons. Futaba had somehow managed to convince me to join in on her shenanigans, and I had found myself allowing her to perch herself on my shoulders with her arms extended horizontally. She’d gotten it into her head that such an action would, in her words, “assert dominance” over the Shadows. I had tried to convince her that a simple pose would not intimidate our enemies, but as we approached them, they would indeed cower in fear.

I hadn’t the heart to tell her that it was more likely that they feared our relatively overwhelming strength rather than her attempts at intimidation. I think it was the rather adorable, almost pouting face she put on in her attempt to look as fierce as possible that I enjoyed about that moment the most.

Suffice to say that my passion for art had not dwindled in my time as a Phantom Thief. In face, it only grew stronger as I found myself with much more inspiration and influence with each dive into the Metaverse. Opportunities to exercise such inspiration came more frequently than they ever had, as well, as I put my first piece of work into an exhibition on my own for the first time, as well as utilize my skills to help strengthen Ren’s Personas. With a set of empowered cards, each of them painstakingly drawn over several hours by hand, he was able to create Personas that the rest of us could only view in fear and admiration.

But the pieces of art I have enjoyed working on the most are the portraits I have of each of them. It’s an easy task for me to visualize each of my friends and translate what I see to a canvas. But those paintings mean more to me than simply the faces and expressions captured on them. The time I spent with each of them, whether such time was positive or negative, was time that I never would have thought I would’ve had, had I not chased after Ann on that day. There isn’t a single minute I wish I could have back in favor of spending it on anything else. If it weren’t for that group, I shudder to think where I would be now.

Or if I would be anywhere at all, had Madarame’s abuse been allowed to continue.

But those people not only the ones that saved my life, but they gave me the one thing I never thought I needed in my life. Yes, there were times that they helped me keep fed or assisted with money management, but those are material things compared to the one belonging each of them gave me. It was something that can never truly be tangible, but each time I look at the paintings on my wall, I cannot help but be reminded of the fact that the object still exists.

Hm? My phone seems to be ringing. Oh dear, it’s Futaba. I should probably go meet with her at our scheduled place before she becomes upset with me.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was inspired by the Futaba and Yusuke T-Pose by kanaminprpr on Twitter. Look for the artwork and have your heart warmed.


	6. Creating a Medley

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which I realize why Haru is my least favorite member of the Phantom Thieves.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Before anybody says anything about me slamming Da Floof, I'm not. Let me explain.
> 
> Ryuji, Makoto and Futaba were the easiest people for me to write. I connected with the three of them in so many ways, so it made it extremely easy to figure out what interests to find for them and how they'd feel when they were working those interests. Yusuke and Ann were a little more difficult, since I had felt fewer connections with them than the first three. I still felt like I was able to pull something together for them.
> 
> Haru, on the other hand, was an absolute beast to write for. I had fewer connections to her as a character than I did any other Phantom Thief, and I felt like the pacing of the game really robs the player of feeling like they're actually developing a relationship with her over time compared to just about everyone else.
> 
> That being said, I'm proud of what I was able to bang out for Haru. Without any further ado, let's get right into it!

If there’s one thing I discovered in my time with my friends, it’s that there’s nothing quite like watching someone take their very first bite.

Um, perhaps that needs a little explanation. You see, it all started during my 3 rd year at Shujin Academy. There had been an incident early in the year where a second-year student tried to take her life. I won’t go into detail about what it was that caused her to believe that, that was the best course of action for her, but thankfully, our leader was able to help her, and Ann, find a way to relieve some of the pain. Hopefully, all of it.

Speaking of our leader, if it weren’t for him, and for little Mona, I would be living a life far darker than the one I lead now. I had always lived under my father’s shadow. I suppose it isn’t too hard to do that when your father is the president of one of the world’s largest fast food corporations. For most of my life, I had things handed to me. Father was able to give me anything at all that I wanted. Anything, except for the one thing I wanted the most: him. He spent so much time working, even while he was at home, that he hardly ever had time for me. I felt like I was a low priority for him. Like he cared more about the money he was making with Okumura Foods than about the relationship he had with his own daughter. He had even arranged a marriage for me with one of his business partners.

It wasn’t until it was too late that I learned how wrong I was. He was so focused on his work because he wanted better for me than he had at my age. I just wish that he knew that it wasn’t so much money or things that I wanted, but just for him to give me a hug every now and then.

It was difficult to feel like I belonged at home. But the Phantom Thieves? They gave me purpose. They made me feel at home. They were the closest I felt to having a family in a long time.

So when I was accepted as one of them, I was eager. Eager to prove myself worthy of that trust. Eager to do whatever I could to help. If some of the accounts of my contributions in our battles were any indication, though, I _may_ have been just a tad too eager.

“If she ever looks at me like that, tell my Mom I love her,” I think were the words Ryuji used to describe me after a battle. I’ll admit, being in a fight was rather cathartic. When I wasn’t using Milady or Astarte to mentally attack our enemies, my axe and my grenade launcher helped relieve the stresses of having lived the way I did under my father.

It also helped when it came to life after his passing.

Sadly for me, though, those days were rather short-lived. Everything seemed to move so quickly after we infiltrated Sae Niijima’s —the older sister to our team strategist and my fellow 3 rd year, Makoto-- Palace. It hardly felt like we had time to spend together as friends. Most of our group gatherings had one thing or another to do with the Metaverse. Thankfully, though, even our shorter days spent fighting Shadows gave us plenty of opportunities to bond with each other. I may have been the least experienced Phantom Thief, but it didn’t take long for me to feel like I had a place in the team and the circle.

It was pretty fun to reign in Ryuji’s particularly forward comments about his female teammates. One smile meant just as much as me saying anything.

Even then, though, there was still a part of me that felt like I didn’t really belong. Everyone  on the team had their own ways to contribute. Ryuji was the team’s motivator. Ann, the sensible voice. Makoto, our strategist. Yusuke, through all of his eccentricities, could inspire the people around him. Futaba, our youngest member, was an expert at information gathering and interpreting. And Ren, despite not being particularly gifted at any of those at first, was the binding force that brought us together as a group.

So where was my place? What was it I could do, aside from blowing things up or swinging at things with my axes, that could help outside of battle? I mean, I could easily fund most of our team’s expenses thanks to my personal bank account,  but I wanted to do more. I didn’t want my one and only real contribution to the group to be how quickly I could pull out my credit card when we needed it. I wanted to do something that would really feel like I was adding something. Something that Ren and the others could come to me for, and that I could happily give them when they asked.

And then, one day, Ren asked me about my rooftop planters.

Shortly after the death of my father, I had invited Ren to the roof of the Academy,  where I had gotten special permission from the faculty to grow some plants. I had been seeing a therapist in the time I was away from school after Father’s passing, and she had suggested that I do something with my time to help me cope with his loss. Gardening had been an interest of mine for some time, so I thought I would focus my efforts on that. I invited Ren to meet me there so I could show him that I was going to be okay. That I’d found a way to help me live life after Father’s passing, and that I was more than happy to bring him along with me.

“What else can you grow up there?”

That one question was the catalyst I needed. I had a few small vegetables growing at the time, so  the first harvest came relatively quickly. I had taken the crop to Leblanc, where Ren was staying, so I could ask Boss to taste test it.

T hinking back on it, I think Boss being rather blunt about what he thought of them was the birth of that spark. As a young girl that had yet to really find her way, criticism that harsh should’ve shaken me. It should’ve made me feel like I’d wasted my time on them.

Instead, I felt my resolve harden. I could feel Mila dy in the back of my mind. It was like she put her hand on my shoulder, giving me the push I needed to figure out what to do.

So I went back. I started experimenting with my veggies, trying to figure out what it would take to get them to the best quality they could be. I changed the soil, the fertilizer, the amounts of water they received. I changed as much as I possibly could, and I went back. For a time, Boss became my unofficial taste tester. It became a weekly appointment for us; I would bring in my latest harvest, and he would tell me what he thought of it. I would take notes, figure out what it was that worked and what didn’t, and try again the next week.

Eventually, though, I began  to consider more about what I was doing. Boss was helping me with refining my vegetables, but eventually he taught me how to make a couple of dishes with them. He helped me use them in ways that I would never have thought of myself. Even though he only ever made curry at Leblanc, it surprised me to learn just how much Boss knew about cooking.  After a couple of lessons, I invited the team to sit down and try them for the first time.

“Registered Meatitarian,” as Ryuji called himself, couldn’t help but look dreamy-eyed when he took his first bite. That dish was met with praise from my team and, for the first time since I’d joined the Phantom Thieves, I got the feeling of accomplishment that I had been searching for.

School programs often teach young students the dangers of drug abuse. How drugs can harm you physically and mentally. I just wish they could have said how addicting positive reinforcement can be. Those programs could push that as a good alternative to drugs.

The problem, though, was that I had a limited selection of vegetables, and there were only so many ways we could prepare them before he ran out of ideas.  Because of that,  we began to work some meat into the dishes.  With each new dish, that exhilaration came back. That sense of purpose. Knowing that I was  finally  contributing something to the Phantom Thieves  made me feel like I was properly part of the family. Every now and then, someone would come to me, asking me to make something to eat. And, of course, I happily obliged. It didn’t hurt that, by themselves, the vegetables had special effects on us in the Metaverse. It made  sense for me to prep some lunch baskets to take with us.

It also gave me an excuse to come up with some more dishes for us to have.

With Father gone, I’m due to take over as President of Okumura Foods. It took some time and effort to convince one of my shareholders to use properly-grown coffee beans in our cafes. Now I’m trying to work out the best presentation to bring to the board. I don’t have the money to work toward opening my own restaurant, so I have to convince them to release some funding to help. I have this feeling, though, that I shouldn’t have any problems with getting the money.

Even if I don’t, though, Ann and Ryuji said they knew where they could find some logs for me to split.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Next chapter is the last. It's going to be a bit different compared to the other chapters.
> 
> Also, I'm considering reworking Ann's chapter. Looking between it and the rest, it just doesn't feel like it fits in with the rest of the series. I might go forward with the rework, but it won't be until after the Ren/Morgana chapter.
> 
> Yes, I just spoiled the subject of the last chapter. As if you didn't already figure that out. ;D
> 
> If you like what you’ve seen and want to keep up with the Internet’s Eternal Phenomenon, then be sure to follow me on social media! I’m on Twitter (@MysticDeadman), Instagram (@mystic_deadman), DeviantArt (MysticDeadman), Fanfiction (Mystic Deadman) and YouTube (Mystic Deadman)!
> 
> I also stream! My stream schedule is on my Twitter, and my channel can be found at twitch.tv/mysticdeadman


	7. Piece of Me

If you would’ve asked me a year ago, “So, Ren, what would you do if you had to face God,” my answer probably would’ve been something humble. Ask Him a question. Find out something I’ve always wanted to know. Maybe even find out how to make the world a better place.

I never would’ve thought that my actual response would be to have a giant devil take a rifle and blow a hole in His head.

Then again, none of the insanity that was a solid year of my life was anything I expected to happen. If I had a chance to redo any of it, I’d easily turn that down. Spending months in jail, exploring a crazy alternate world, gaining incredible powers? All of that was worth the things I’d gotten to go along with all of that.

It’s been a few months, but God I miss seeing all of them. We had so much fun together, even if we didn’t all start as friends. Well, Ryuji was the only one who didn’t act any kind of hostile toward me at first. Sure, he was confused when we first met, but that was because he didn’t know that I was a transfer student and that I wouldn’t have known who Kamoshida was.

And what kind of monster he actually was, too.

That first real heist, the first time we actually went after a treasure in the Metaverse opened my eyes to so many things. First, I needed to get out more. I’d spent a lot of time in my room before the night that changed my life, though not quite as much as Futaba spent in hers. Still, that didn’t really give me a whole lot of time to make friends. I largely kept to myself, mostly because I preferred to keep it that way. I didn’t have a problem with people or anything, but I felt like I needed to focus on school more than anything.

After meeting everyone, though, it became pretty clear that, that was just an excuse. I think a part of me was kind of afraid to meet people. I’m not exactly sure why, though. Maybe I was worried that people would see me as weird? The Metaverse showed me that everyone is weird in their own ways, so I had no reason to be afraid of that. Maybe I really did put my grades ahead of everything else? My grades were pretty good, so that couldn’t have been it.

Maybe the actual reason’s been lost to me. I had so much going on at one point that it was hard to balance meeting with so many people about a thousand different things going on. Though, I will say I did tend to prioritize time with Makoto a little more than the rest.

Can’t help it. Too damn cute.

God, I miss them. Sure, we still trade texts, pics, and the occasional video, but it’s not the same. You can do all that with anyone you want, but there’s no real substitute for actually being face-to-face with someone. Conversations feel more real. You get to see all the reactions and hear the emotion in real time. No heavy processing to get in the way. I miss that. I miss the in-person interactions.

But most off all, I really miss _them_.

Everyone’s told me about different things they’ve been doing ever since I came back home. Different hobbies they’d gotten into after things had settled down. Well, everyone but Futaba. For some reason, she hadn’t really talked about hers. She _has_ told me that she’s been getting out a lot more, though, so I’ll accept that. Besides, she promised me that she’d show me what she was doing the next time I was in town. I hope she knows I’m coming back for a few days today.

I’m looking over some of the things I’d kept since my time as a Phantom Thief. A couple of the airsoft guns, a couple of the costume knives. Some cards Yusuke drew that I ended up not using.  As I’m scanning over them, I can’t help but feel the memories come flooding back to me. Ryuji getting payback punches from the track team. Ann getting mad over the other model trying to make her look bad. Yusuke putting his artwork in a public display himself for the first time. Makoto slapping the player in his stupid face. Futaba walking through a store for the first time.  Haru taking her axe to her arranged future husband's Shadow.

If I could do anything differently, the only thing I would change is trying the Water of Rebirth. I would’ve been so happy for the rest of my life not reading the ingredients list.

“Hey, we’re going to be late! Hurry up already!”

I can’t help but chuckle at that. Even after all this time, Mona can’t help but nag me about this or that.

“Relax, I’ll be down in a minute.”

Morgana hops up onto my shoulders. “What are you doing, anyway?”

“Just thinking about things.” He pats me on the head with a paw.

“Don’t worry, you’ll be able to see them soon.”

Yeah, and I can’t wait. I miss them all, though maybe a certain red-eyed strategist a little more than others. Good thing she’s the one giving me a ride.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a fun series to work on. I can honestly say that, while it's taken me some time to figure things out with this, I don't regret a single word of it.
> 
> This also marks the first time in my writing career that I've finished something that's more than 2 chapters. Hopefully this means nothing but good things for my other stories. I hope you guys have enjoyed the ride just as much as I have, and I'll see you guys in the future!
> 
> If you like what you’ve seen and want to keep up with the Internet’s Eternal Phenomenon, then be sure to follow me on social media! I’m on Twitter (@MysticDeadman), Instagram (@mystic_deadman), DeviantArt (MysticDeadman), Fanfiction (Mystic Deadman) and YouTube (Mystic Deadman)!

**Author's Note:**

> If you like what you’ve seen and want to keep up with the Internet’s Eternal Phenomenon, then be sure to follow me on social media! I’m on Twitter (@MysticDeadman), Instagram (@mystic_deadman), DeviantArt (MysticDeadman) and YouTube (Mystic Deadman)!


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